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August 23, 2016

i'm a big girl now...

I just moved into a new home. Like a big girl home. Not an apartment, but like an actual house with a front lawn and backyard and even a driveway! [ i know, i'm stepping up in the world ] Unfortunately, big girl homes come with a lot of expensive necessities. I'm not talking about electricity bills and water bills and taxes etc. Yeah yeah yeah, I understand a house is more expensive. What I am talking about though is like the other necessities to actually run a functioning home for your family. Did you guys know how much a refrigerator costs? Fridges cost over a grand for a brand spankin' new one! Like holy cow! I DID NOT KNOW THIS! I was apparently never privy to this information before and now that I must buy one I just can't fathom spending that much money on it.

Besides a fridge I also have to buy a washer and dryer, some patio furniture, and a mattress. All of these things are a GRAND...EACH! How is this possible? Okay, so I totally understand that a washer/dryer combo should be a grand+ because, like, you're getting two things for that price. What I can't figure out is why in the world a refrigerator costs over a $1,000 bucks! I mean I want it to have an ice maker, because, duh, I like ice in my drinks and if you want that, then you better expect to shell out the dolla dolla bills ya'll!

I will admit that you can find patio furniture under a grand [phew!] But most of the sets still cost $500-$800. Like what in the actual fuck. It's just a table and chairs. I'm about to pinterest this shit and become a carpenter and make my own set. Better yet, I think I'll just move my kitchen table in and out of the house every time I want to enjoy the outside patio.

On the plus side, the previous tenants of the home were nice enough to leave a patio table set behind. [ BOOM! ] However, the seat cushions are lookin' a little...disgusting. So, I was thinking to myself, "no problem, I'll just replace the cushions and BAM I have a patio set." Much to my dismay, the CHEAPEST cushions [with seat and back cushion] are $40 EACH. That is literally THE CHEAPEST ONES anywhere. I'm sorry, but what exactly am I paying for? It is some cheap ass material covering some foam and they want to charge me almost $200 smackers for 4 cushions. If you want them to be cute too, then forget about it. You're basically going to spend $400 on cushions and at that rate you might as well buy a whole new set of chairs. I seriously thought I could find some simple cushions for like $15 bucks each. Have I just been living under a rock? I feel like I am old enough that I should know these things. That I should know how much the adult life costs, but I am still shocked on a daily basis when finding out about these expenditures.

Next up is a mattress. My lovely little cute sweet kitty LITERALLY ripped the seams out of the mattress so when you picked it up alllll the insides came pouring out. love you, sweet baby, non vicious, kitty. I start doing my research on mattresses and low and behold, it's another grand I have to shell out. [FUCK YOU, KITTY]. Not only is it $800-$1500 for a new mattress, but buying one is confusing as fuck! I am so stressed out that I am going to buy one that is too soft and it will just collapse in a month. Or it will be too hard and then my shoulders and hips will hurt. And to be pretty dang honest, I SUCK at returning things. I would most likely just be like, fuck it, and keep the shitty too hard or too soft mattress for the next like 10 years. So far what I have learned is that if you want a good mattress that is actually comfortable to sleep on and will last a few years, you have to spend another $1,000 [at least].

 Have you guys totaled up how much I need to spend to be an adult? It's anywhere from $3200 - $4500 basically. Okay so I can make due with out patio furniture [for now] but the other three items are pretty essential. I need sleep. I need clean clothes. I need my food preserved.

I'm about to start a gofundme page in hopes that people will donate to me being able to survive as an adult.

xx,

#HOTMESSMOM

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